5 Steps to Stop Letting Perfectionism Hold You Back
A Guide from a Recovering Perfectionist
“Perfection is like chasing the horizon. Keep moving,” advised Neil Gaiman in his sixth rule of writing and David Foster Wallace similarly warned, “If your fidelity to perfectionism is too high, you never do anything.” But while most of us understand the dangers of perfectionism, we still seem to find ourselves falling victim to it.
Calls for perfectionism are all around us. We’re constantly being told that we should be doing more and working harder. As we set high goals and fail to meet them, we push ourselves even more. We’re becoming more expectant of ourselves and more expectant of those around us in a world that’s never been more focused on competition and meritocracy.
It’s easy to rationalize perfectionism by saying that it’s just having high standards. But there’s a big difference in striving for excellence and being a perfectionist. Excellence is pushing for high quality. It’s about improving and doing the best that you can. Perfectionism is trying to meet an impossible level. It causes people to be highly critical of both themselves and others, often leading to high levels of stress and fear of judgement. As Anne Lamott wrote in Bird by Bird,
“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you…